Thanks for Witson,
I have found the answer--because the host server they don't have any outgoing email servers.
because they think if they did allow outgoing email then their mail servers could be used for anonymous spam.
So I will need to use my existing outgoing mail server as supplied by my ISP.
But "shanghai shihua"will not allow any but their(or maybe all xxx.cn) mail servers to be used.
In this case I only can send email by my old way(dial up an unblocked ISP provider)use 56k...unless I found a free smtp address.
but never mind I will change all my emails to hotmail soon
apple
BTW, I also tried smtp.mail.yahoo.com